Working Mum Life

My day starts at 5am, usually I am awake from 4:30am and I lie there snuggling my cats just waiting to drag myself out of bed to get ready. Although, yesterday I somehow forgot to set my alarm and woke up at 5:24am... leaving me just a few minutes to get dressed, make some coffee and run out the house! Not a great start to the day.
When I wake up no one else in the house is up so I stealthy get myself dressed, having laid out all my clothes the night before, to ensure I don’t wake my little person or my big person! I then sneak downstairs and put the kettle on, as I desperately need coffee. I think my blood is 50% caffeine.
I then feed the cats who are meowing very loudly by this point. I take the quiet time to just relax and settle my mind for the day; if the weather is good I will sit in the garden. I really enjoy the quiet time as this is the only time I get it EVER! I check my phone for messages overnight from the business.
I leave for work at 5:40am as I have a long commute to my day job, it’s 72 miles. Now, I know when people hear that they wonder why I work so far, how I do the commute every day etc. These questions also entered my mind when I made the decision to take this role but my previous role involved national travel all over the country... so this is nothing! Also I work 4 days, not 5, although they are 10 hour days plus the commute. So, it’s around 60 hours in total during these 4 days.
I don’t get to see my daughter in the mornings and after spending so much time with her during lockdown, I am really missing her and it’s racking on the Mum guilt big time! And when I get home, depending on traffic, it’s usually 18:45pm ish so she is pretty much ready for bed. I rush upstairs to get changed, hand wash and sanitise so we can watch the Cbeebies bedtime story, all snuggled up on the sofa together. She usually gets quite excited when I get home and has a little burst of energy, dancing and singing. Then after the bedtime story, we go upstairs to her room and read some books together. Lately after I have read her a book, she will read it back to me (obviously not reading but memorising elements of the book) and tells me that I am a good girl and well done which melts my heart.
Later Daddy comes up around 19:15pm and I say goodnight to her. Daddy puts her to bed so I can go and eat my dinner. Usually I’m eating my dinner between 19:30pm and 20:00pm, which my partner has lovingly prepared for me. And this goes on for 4 very long very tiring days, where I see her for 30 minutes or so in a whole day. Trigger Mum guilt again! Breaks my heart but I know it isn’t forever, I know it’s a means to an end, I know it’s necessary. As the main breadwinner in our family it’s fundamentally important – for now.
I am usually responding to customer enquiries, doing bits in the workshop, occasionally I can just plonk myself in front of the TV for an hour or so (still usually working on admin) but not very often. I then get to bed around 9:30pm and try to sleep so I don’t wake up too exhausted the next day. Sometimes I can shut off but sometimes I just lay there mulling over life and all the universe.
My partner does the nursery drop offs and pick-ups as he works full-time also. I then get 3 days off and one of those days is a Mummy and Elara day. I make sure that we have lots of fun things planned on this day. Whether that be exploring the woods, going for a long walk gruffalo hunting, playing in the garden painting rocks – all sorts of stuff. I am basically trying to cure my Mum guilt by making that day so full of fun that she will remember this rather than remembering my absence, Mum guilt strikes again!
We then have 2 family days together if my partner isn’t doing overtime. Oh did I forget to mention I also run my business alongside all of this? So around all of this I am creating, crafting, posting, expanding Eternally Cherished. Some of my friends call me superwoman which is very flattering but I certainly do not feel like superwoman, I feel like an old tired woman and I certainly don’t have a cape! (Maybe I should get one mmmm).
I rarely get time for myself but stay motivated because the business is my passion and I know that it will be worth it in the long run. Although I do miss out on quite a lot, it isn’t forever, it’s just for now. Each day I am working towards the end goal which is running my business fulltime from home, being my own boss and managing my own time, according to my rules and no one else’s.